June 16, 2011

Dear Mom,

I want to remind you how much fun we had on your birthday, June 16th, the day before you were killed in a motorcycle accident.

I had bought you two tops from JC Penney for your present. I admit that I had waited until the last minute. Although I searched through the store to find something that was appropriate, yet not "grandma-ish," I admit that I didn't put much thought into the gift. I knew you'd love anything I gave you... even if it was nothing. I settled on a fun sleeveless embellished top and a work-appropriate black blouse. I didn't even put any thought into the wrapping. I just found an old Vera Bradley bag and placed them inside with some tissue paper. The following day, after I had been notified of your passing, I would find these two tops hanging up from your dresser, waiting to be worn.

After I gave you your gift and we played with Logan a little bit, the three of us went out to lunch at Olive Garden. We both had the "unlimited soup and salad" while you spent more time playing with Logan, feeding him his puffs, than eating. I do remember you tried to give him a crouton, which upset me because he only had two stumps for teeth...

Once lunch was over we went across the street to Old Navy so I could do some shopping. While I browsed, you took care of Logan and played with him on a bench near the fitting rooms. I remember hearing people walk by and making comments about your adorable grandson, and you would respond about Logan being the perfect baby. When Logan got cranky, you fed and rocked him, all the while encouraging me to get a few more outfits.

When I had finished shopping we headed back to my house. I had asked if you wanted to make an extra stop by the library, as I had a book on hold, but you were eager to get home and take the motorcycle out with Bob. I dropped you by my house so you could pick up your car, while I ran in to get my library card. When I came out you were giving Logan, who was still sleeping in his car seat, a kiss and telling him that you'd see him later. You then gave me a hug and kiss on the cheek (which I wiped off because of your lipstick). I know you thanked me for the tops and probably said you loved me as well.

That was the last time I saw you... While I'm so very grateful for the wonderful day we had, I wish so much that I would've hugged you just a little harder. To be able to give you one last hug, and to just hold onto you for even one second longer, I would give anything.